


Our Secret

by poorly_animated



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Ear Piercings, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Light Angst, Post-Canon, Secret Relationship, Snowball Fight, Valentine's Day Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:28:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29439009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poorly_animated/pseuds/poorly_animated
Summary: Amane and Canary celebrate Valentine’s Day.
Relationships: Amane/Canary
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	Our Secret

**Author's Note:**

  * For [windoworld](https://archiveofourown.org/users/windoworld/gifts).



The base of Kukuroo Mountain sleeps under a thick blanket of snow, tucked into the wild whiteness wherever the dormant volcanic heat is too far below-ground to keep ice from forming. Above Mike’s hunting grounds, the snow is flawless, crisp and bright in the first rays of February sun. Flawless, that is, except for a long line of solitary footprints tracing a path from the butler’s quarters to a lone black dot under an icy pine. Canary buries her face a bit deeper in her scarf to stifle a yawn. She’s been up for hours already, training some of the new hires in hand-to-hand combat, and she’s sure today will bring yet another long, cold, uneventful guard shift. She sighs and looks up at the trees. The branches are nearly indistinguishable under all the snow, each trunk disappearing into a shimmering blob that melts seamlessly into the next sheltered crown as her eyes aimlessly trace the shapes up to the edge of the tree line. Nothing stirs. Canary turns back to her gate and glumly picks at a bit of moss. With most of the young masters gone, the mountainside has been painfully quiet. She even finds herself missing the creepy prickling at the back of her neck that always indicated when Master Kalluto was lurking nearby. 

A soft crunch catches Canary’s ear and she glances over her shoulder, her face splitting into a huge grin as her eyes land on a dark figure stiffly walking towards her. She leans her staff against the wall and bounds down the path of her own footprints. “AMANE!”

Amane’s face goes red enough to see from the wide distance still between them and Canary bursts out laughing as her girlfriend freezes in an angry stance. “Canary,” Amane hisses, just loud enough for the wind to carry, “not so loud!”

“Oops,” Canary giggles, careening into Amane at top speed. She laughs louder as their bodies hit the snow, hugging the taller girl quickly before jumping to her feet with a mischievous grin. “There’s nobody around, though,” she whispers conspiratorially, “not at this time of day.”

Amane dusts herself off furiously as she stumbles back to her feet, trying to maintain a firm scowl in the face of her girlfriend’s ridiculous grin. “Well, yes, obviously,” she whispers back, “that’s the only reason I can even be here! But please, Canary,  _ please _ don’t—we can never be sure!” 

“I know, I know,” Canary sighs. She nods in the direction of her post and drifts back, bending over as if to gather her staff. But before Amane can reach her she whips around and flings a snowball smack into her chest, giggling wildly as it explodes in a cloud of white.

“HEY!” Amane drops to her knees and smashes together a clumsy snowball, accidentally pitching it directly into the middle of Canary’s face. She shrieks as her girlfriend staggers backwards. “OH GOSH—“

“Oh, it’s ON,” Canary laughs, shaking the snow clear of her eyes. She ducks behind the wall and gathers a few quick fistfuls of snow, chucking them at her girlfriend a bit harder than necessary. She squeals as another snowball collides with her face. “AMANE!”

“GOTCHA,” Amane shouts breathlessly, ducking back behind the wall as a return volley whizzes past. “MISSED ME!”

“Why, you,” Canary growls. She jumps around the short wall and tackles Amane into the snow, shoving her face first into a soft pile of white as long arms smash her own face down simultaneously. They roll over and over each other as they tussle, giggling and yelling and rubbing snow all over each other’s faces until their scarves and hats and jackets are completely soaked with crystals. Canary gasps as she lands on her back again. She swiftly grabs both of Amane’s wrists and holds them to her chest, panting giddily as she smiles up at her. “You look beautiful, Amane,” she says happily.

Amane freezes again, her flushed cheeks flushing even darker as the compliment sinks in. “You—you—cheater,” she stammers bashfully, “you’re just trying—to, to distract me, you—“

“You’re just so pretty I can’t take it,” Canary shouts. She sits up and flings her arms around the taller girl, hugging her tightly for just a split second. They jump away from each other as if electrocuted. A hint of sadness poisons the edge of Canary’s smile as she brushes a few loose curls out of her eyes. “Sorry,” she says softly.

“I—I—it’s—we—“ Amane stutters. She whips her head around in a panic, pulling herself to her feet as she scans for any watchful eyes. Without their laughter, the mountain is quiet once more. She exhales a relieved sigh and hugs herself. “Canary,” she says thickly. 

“I know,” Canary whispers. She flops back on the snow with a dramatic groan and covers her eyes with an arm. “It’s so  _ stupid,”  _ she whines, “sometimes I just really wanna kiss you!” 

Amane blushes harder and directs her gaze to the snow at her feet. “I... really want to kiss you, too,” she whispers shyly.

Canary flings her arm back to the ground and grins up at her. “You don’t admit that very often. Did I forget my own birthday or something?”

“I—no—well,” Amane says nervously. She digs her gloved hands into her pockets and fiddles with the edge of the envelope tucked within, trying to work up the courage to hand it over. Her eyes dart fearfully between the trees once more. “It’s—umm—I, um,” she mumbles, “do... do you know what today is?”

“Sunday, February 14th,” Canary yawns. “Only three more weeks until they stick a new trainee down here and I move up to the house!”

“Yes, um, and...”

Canary frowns and sits up. “And what?”

“Well—will you stand up already? Gosh,” Amane sputters. She tugs Canary to her feet and blushes as the shorter girl squeezes her hand. They hold onto each other a few seconds longer than strictly necessary. Amane reluctantly pulls her hand back, awkwardly tucking a long lock of black hair behind her ear again. She clears her throat anxiously. 

“Amaaaaneeee,” Canary teases in a sing-song voice, “what’s gotten into you, huh?”

Amane blushes and thrusts the pink envelope out of her pocket, clumsily shoving it into Canary’s hands before turning on her heels and sprinting back to the butler’s quarters. She’s been away too long. Grandmother will surely notice, and then she’ll find out, and then everything—she forces a huge gulp of cold air into her lungs as she runs, trying to calm down. Nobody knows about her and Canary, and it’ll stay that way. Her legs slow back to a crisp walk as she approaches the huge building. She swallows hard and glances over her shoulder before ducking inside, hoping Canary will understand. 

Canary frowns after her receding shadow and looks down at the envelope, slowly breaking into a smile as she turns it over. The pale pink paper bears her name in neat, familiar cursive. She grins as she rips through a heart-shaped sticker to tear it open. Her eyes widen. She sits down in the snow with a heavy thud, stifling giddy laughter in her scarf as she hugs the note to her chest. “Too cute, too cute,” she squeals to herself, “oh, gosh, she’s so cute!” She pores over the note a few more times, wondering what on earth she’ll do now that she knows today is apparently a holiday. Amane wants to sneak out tonight to see the stars. Canary giggles and clutches the note to her chest again. Her girlfriend  _ never _ wants to do  _ anything _ even  _ remotely _ frowned upon, so this sudden proposition has her heart soaring. The only sour note in her mind’s joyous melody is the knowledge that she doesn’t have anything to give Amane for Valentine’s Day, and with her assignment for the day being to stand by this gate, she certainly won’t have any opportunity to find something. Canary sighs and tucks the note into a pocket. Maybe she can bribe one of the kitchen staff for some chocolate. 

——————

A pale orange light is  _ finally _ burning up the edges of the sky and Canary stretches her arms over her head, craning her neck towards the butler’s quarters in hopes that her replacement will arrive a few minutes early. She’s been positively dizzy with anticipation all day, trying and failing to scrap together some type of gift from the branches and snow around her as she daydreams about her date with Amane that evening. A figure appears beside a far-off tree and she waves excitedly. 

The replacement butler is barely within a hundred yards when Canary leaps away from her post, sprinting back towards the butler’s quarters as she shouts a quick thanks over her shoulder. Breathless giggles crystallize in the air before her as she runs. She dashes into the building and races up to the girls’ wing, careening into her shared bedroom like she’s being chased. Her roommate isn’t there to complain. Canary whoops happily as she sheds her coat, tugging a bright red sweater over her uniform before she bounds back down the stairs and skids into the kitchen. The staff cook glowers at her over a bubbling pot. 

“First dinner’s not ready yet,” she snaps, “and whatever you’re about to ask, the answer is no.”

Canary laughs and leans against the doorframe. “Awww, c’mon, Cookie, maybe I just felt like keeping you company!”

“You’ve never felt that and never will, you little twerp,” the cook chuckles. She waves her spoon at Canary and stirs the stew again, sending the rich, dark scent of cooked meat hovering throughout the kitchen. She shakes her head in amusement. “What do you want, Canary?”

“What’s for dessert? Someone told me it’s a holiday,” Canary says nonchalantly. She gives the cook her most innocent smile when her dark eyes turn back to her. “What?”

“It’s not one we celebrate,” the cook says firmly. She adjusts the heat and faces Canary again, crossing her huge arms over her chest. “It’s Valentine’s Day, hon, it’s a celebration of love,” she sighs, “so, no, there’s no dessert tonight.”

Canary pouts dramatically. “Damn! Well, do you think you could slip me some dessert anyways? I’d kill for a hot cocoa,” she says hopefully. 

“Hmmph. Do some dishes for once and maybe we’ll talk,” the cook replies.

“YES! I mean, will do,” Canary giggles. She skips down to one of the lounges and plops into an armchair, still giggling to herself. A few glances are tossed her way, but everyone else is too focused on their movie to bother inquiring about her giddiness. Canary squeezes her fists excitedly. If she can get the cook to take the hot cocoa down, she can sneak an extra mug out to Amane, which seems pretty Valentine’s-y in her opinion. She hums happily and grins up at the television, letting the movie wash over her as she daydreams. 

Amane pokes her head into five different rooms before she spots Canary’s pigtails in the armchair and blushes, ducking back into the hallway. Her heart is racing. She doesn’t trust herself to be near her right now, and she  _ certainly _ doesn’t trust Canary to hold back from flirting. But she’s also desperate to know whether her girlfriend is going to follow through with their plan. Amane’s worst nightmare—at least, her worst nightmare right now—is sneaking out only to find herself alone in the freezing dark. She peeks into the room again and nervously sidles up behind Canary’s chair, dropping a thrice-folded note into her lap. 

Canary startles and whips around but Amane is already back in the hallway, her long, black hair receding down the dimly lit passage as she walks. Canary sighs and unfolds the note.

_ Y/N? _

She giggles and quickly swallows the paper, scribbling a small “Y” on a corner from a nearby notepad. She drifts out of the lounge and scans the other rooms for her girlfriend. Her blood ices over when she hears a familiar set of footsteps marching down the stairs. Canary darts back to the lounge and folds herself into her chair, trying to act as though she’s been watching the movie the whole time while Tsubone makes her rounds. A shadow falls across her lap and she swallows.

“Miss Canary,” Tsubone says sweetly, “what are you holding?”

Canary forces a grin and pulls a cootie catcher out of her sleeve. She’s made dozens of the stupid things, each tucked into different articles of clothing for exactly this purpose: decoys in case anyone sees her holding one of Amane’s little notes. She turns in her seat and holds it up to the enormous woman. “It’s a fortune teller! Here,” she explains, moving her fingers, “pick one of the colors!”

“Hmm. Red,” Tsubone answers.

“Red, okay, R-E-D,” Canary stammers. She pauses and gestures at Tsubone again. “Now you pick a number.”

“Seven.”

“Oh, it’s—well, seven is fine,” Canary says lamely, not wanting to explain that she was supposed to pick one of the numbers written on her flaps. She counts her movements and stops on the next set of numbers. “Now you pick one of these numbers.”

Tsubone sighs. “Five.”

“Okay, five, ummm, onetwothreefourfive,” Canary mumbles. Her cheeks hurt from forcing this smile. She swallows and raises her eyebrows playfully. “Now pick one more number,” she says cheerfully.

“Five again,” Tsubone says in a bored tone.

“Great! Lemme just—ugh,” Canary mutters. She fumbles with the flaps and pulls open Tsubone’s selection. Her heart drops into her stomach. “Ummmm...”

“What? Tell me my fortune, dear,” Tsubone says as she leans closer.

Canary groans inwardly and quickly reads the fortune she wrote, cursing her past self for making a love-themed one. “It says your true love is closer than you think, haha, um, but, they’re, they’re just random little—Um—“

“Ah, I see,” Tsubone says as she straightens her back again. An eerie, unnatural smile crawls across her face and Canary shudders. “Too true, my dear! My true love is my work and this blessed family,” she sighs happily. She bows formally and leaves the room, off to lurk around other butlers she thinks of as problems.

Canary releases a huge sigh and slumps down into the chair, crushing the cootie catcher in her fist. She turns around to scowl at the movie. When they change her position in a few weeks, she’ll be in the house for the first time in her life, something she’s dreamed of for years. But now, Master Killua is gone, and Tsubone will be her direct supervisor, watching her every move and keeping her away from Amane. Canary groans and sinks lower in her seat. This is probably why, she thinks to herself,  _ why that rule exists.  _ She can remember the bodies wrung to death in the halls of her home, the blood saturating the tiny field of her childish vision. The rumors. Yasuha, who went to the house and never came back.  _ Still, it’s hard to give a damn about anyone but Amane, and I’m supposed to lay my life down for the family. But if any of them hurt her in any way I wouldn’t be able to forgive it. _ She doesn’t have time to think about these things. The dinner bell is ringing.

——————

Canary giggles softly to herself as her hands scrub through the bubbles, remembering the far sharper whiteness of her earlier snowball fight with Amane. The cook glances at her.

“Having fun?”

“I told Tsubone’s fortune earlier,” Canary chuckles smoothly. She winks at the cook as she places a pot on the rack. “Just a cootie catcher, of course, but she really seemed to buy it, which was hilarious!”

The cook smiles. “You’re an odd one, Canary.”

“Oh well,” Canary laughs. She dries the last of the dishes and turns around excitedly. “Cocoa?”

As the milk heats up, a bell rings. The cook frowns. “What could she want from me  _ now? _ Third dinner’s over and done with,” she grumbles. She gestures towards the stove pot as she leaves. “Don’t burn down this house.”

Canary beams and takes down two travel mugs from the cabinet. She carefully pours the cocoa and screws the caps on tight, scrubbing the pot clean before she dashes down the hall. Her hands shake as she buttons her coat.  _ The children are away, so Masters Illumi and Kalluto won’t find us. And with the children gone, Mistress Kikyo has been spending more and more time indoors. Master Silva hasn’t been home for weeks. Mike is below the gate. Master Zeno... nobody’s seen Master Zeno for some time now.  _ Canary takes a deep breath and rummages through her drawers until she finds a small ribbon she found in the gazebo once. She ties a bow around one of the mugs and smiles. Now all that’s left is getting out the door.

Amane smoothes her jacket for what feels like the hundredth time as her grandmother’s voice grows louder. She’s been sitting beside her for the last forty-five minutes, trying not to listen in on the phone call she’s having with an estranged nephew. Tsubone scoffs so loudly it makes Amane jump.

“You’re an absolute disgrace,” Tsubone barks into the phone, “I’m so glad your poor father isn’t alive to hear of this!” She smashes the call off and jumps to her feet, taking a deep, angry breath. She smiles. Her voice comes out smoother when she speaks again. “Amane, dear, do you know what today is?”

“Sunday, February 14th,” Amane says obediently. 

“And do you know what that means?”

Amane nods curtly. “Many people celebrate the feast of Saint Valentine today.”

“Mmm. Precisely,” Tsubone exclaims, “many people, but not us. We have no need for such things.”

“Of course, grandmother,” Amane whispers. 

“Do you think  _ love _ is something shown with teddy bears and chocolates, dear? Do you think a  _ saint _ has anything to do with the irrationality of  _ love?” _

“No, grandmother,” Amane replies, “love is watching over someone, even when they disappoint you.”

Tsubone smiles. “Exactly as I’ve always taught you, my dear. I’m so proud,” she says emotionally. She pinches Amane’s cheek and straightens her back. “You may go now.”

“Yes, grandmother.”

Amane backs out of the room as quickly as she dares, stifling a nervous laugh in her hand as she strides down the hall.  _ She doesn’t know, she doesn’t know!  _ Her heart leaps ahead of her as she feels the note Canary passed her at dinner and a huge smile breaks free. She races to her room, red-faced and happy, and flings her uniform into the closet in favor of a pale pink sweater. Amane brushes her hair in the mirror over and over again before carefully wrapping a warm scarf around her head. She tucks a small box into her bag and squeezes her hands excitedly. With grandmother in for the night, there’s almost nothing to worry about—the few family members left on the mountain have been keeping inside for weeks at a time, and she knows from experience that the Mistress steadfastly refuses to step out in the snow. The sky looks clear from her small window. She leaves a note on her pillow for her roommate and rushes giddily down the stairs.

Canary finishes picking the lock and shoulders her way through the door, bursting into the snowy night with a huge grin. The back entrances to the butler’s quarters haven’t been used since Master Milluki was born and Master Silva had the pathway up to the house repaved. She tiptoes under the windows and darts out into the forest, giggling to herself as she runs. The mugs of cocoa are warm against her chest, heating the inside of her jacket and expelling tiny gasps of steam into the freezing air. Canary ducks into a ruined folly on the far side of the mountain and checks her watch. She’s a few minutes early, so she sets about clearing off a section of the stone floor so they can sit. Hopefully Amane’s been able to slip away from her grandmother. Otherwise, Canary muses, she’ll just have to drink all of the cocoa herself.

Snow crunches nearby and Canary pops her head out of the crumbling structure, waving excitedly. Amane rushes over and wraps her in a hug, squeezing her so tightly that Canary can’t breathe—not that she minds. She squishes Amane even harder in return. They break apart in fits of breathless giggles, both girls dizzy from the secrecy and unexpected success of their outing. Amane pulls her bag off and grins.

“I brought a blanket so our butts wouldn’t be cold,” she giggles. She pulls out a thick quilt left behind by her mother and carefully spreads it across the floor, flattening any bumps as neatly as if she were making the Mistress’ bed. 

Canary tries to peek into Amane’s bag and laughs as her girlfriend snatches it away. “Ooh, are there more surprises in there?”

“Maybe,” Amane whispers. She blushes hard as she pulls out a few lumpy candles, placing them in a small cluster at the head of the blanket. She tucks her hair behind her ears nervously and rummages through the bag again. “And, um—I know you probably didn’t have time to get me anything, but I—“

“Here,” Canary says softly. She kneels next to Amane and proudly hands over the mug, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Cookie was distracted,” she giggles, “so I got us some hot cocoa!”

Amane goes even redder. Her hands shake around the mug and she gingerly touches her cheek as she looks at Canary. “I... thank you,” she whispers shyly, hugging the mug to her chest. “You didn’t have to do anything!”

“Aww, I wanted to,” Canary laughs. She sits cross-legged and gives Amane an excited grin. “So, what did you get me? Besides the cutest letter ever written,” she teases.

“You’re so impatient,” Amane giggles. She takes a sip of cocoa and bites down on her giddy smile. “Wow, I haven’t had cocoa in ages,” she whispers happily. 

Canary beams at her. “Me either! And it’s the perfect night for it,” she gushes, “with all the snow, and the prettiest girl in the world!”

Amane’s face had finally been returning to its natural color, but the freely given compliment flushes her cheeks bright red again. “Canary!”

“I mean it,” Canary laughs, “I think you’re the prettiest girl in the world.” She glances out into the empty woods and leans forward, giving Amane another quick peck on the cheek. “Wow, it’s amazing to be able to be near you like this,” she says softly. 

“You—y-you’re th-the prettiest,” Amane stammers bashfully. She hides her face behind her mug and giggles shyly. “I  _ did _ get you something, by the way,” she whispers.

Canary leans closer excitedly. “Well, show me!!”

“Close your eyes!” Amane waits until Canary covers both eyes with her hands and turns around, reaching into her bag for the small box. Her hands are shaking again. She’s not sure why she’s so nervous: it’s not as though Canary will somehow hate the gift enough to stop speaking to her forever. Even so, that’s the outcome her mind is convinced will happen. She takes a deep breath and thrusts her hand out. “Okay, you, um, you can open your eyes now,” she whispers.

Canary’s big brown eyes fly open and go as wide as the full moon as they land on the neatly wrapped box. “Amane! You’re too cute,” she exclaims happily. She snatches the box and pulls at the ribbon, tearing the paper away without a second thought. She gasps. Inside are twin pearl droplets set into thin gold backs. She glances between the earrings and her girlfriend. “How did you—I—wait,” she laughs, “my ears aren’t even pierced!”

“I know that,” Amane huffs. She crosses her arms and smiles nervously. “But don’t you want them to be? I was thinking, um...” She reaches into her back and pulls out a sharpened needle, her voice climbing to a nervous squeak. “I could pierce them?”

“WOW,” Canary yells. She drops the earrings and flings her arms around Amane’s neck, kissing her ear clumsily as she laughs. “You’re SO COOL, AMANE!” She pulls back with a grin. “Who would’ve guessed,” she teases, “look at you, breaking all these rules.” 

Amane screws her eyes shut and jerks her head forward, slamming her pursed lips into Canary’s big smile as quickly as she can. She jumps back, mortified, and starts to apologize, but Canary’s eyes are even wider now, and she’s leaning in again, and then their lips meet once more. Amane gasps as Canary kisses her. She can feel the blush climbing up her cheeks but for once she doesn’t care, she just reaches out and tenderly holds the sides of her girlfriend’s head as their smiles melt together. A giddy laugh bubbles up from her throat and she breaks the kiss, resting her forehead against Canary’s. “Oh,” she whispers, “was that okay?”

“Okay? OKAY?!” Canary shouts. She kisses Amane again, squeezing one of her hands on the ground excitedly, and rocks back on her heels. “THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!”

“Canary, stop shouting,” Amane giggles nervously.

“I CAN’T! I FINALLY GOT TO KISS MY GIRLFRIEND,” Canary laughs. She wraps her arms around Amane’s waist and hugs her tightly, sinking awkwardly across her lap as the taller girl shyly places a hand on her head. “And yes, I totally want you to pierce my ears,” she adds happily, “you beautiful, beautiful genius!”

Amane blushes again and curls over, burying her face in Canary’s snow-dusted pigtails. “Yay,” she whispers shyly. She reaches for the needle again and playfully pokes Canary’s ear with a gloved finger. “You should probably sit up, though,” she giggles.

“Roger that,” Canary barks. She whips up and turns to face Amane, still bouncing excitedly on her heels. “Wait—I should probably stop moving,” she laughs. She takes a dramatic breath and exhales slowly, forcing herself to sit still. Her scarf comes off. She gives Amane a grin. “Okay, let’s do it!”

“I’m warning you, I’ve only done this once, and it was on myself,” Amane says firmly. She takes off a glove and balls it up in one hand, cradling Canary’s head with the lump tucked behind one of her ears. She bites down on her lip and jabs the needle through with a quick yelp. She fumbles for the earrings, clumsily shoving one of the posts through the fresh hole as Canary tries not to flinch. Amane carefully wipes a bit of blood off of the other girl’s dark skin and smiles. “That’s one!”

“That wasn’t half bad,” Canary laughs. She tilts her head slightly, enjoying the feeling of her girlfriend’s hands on her scalp and neck. Amane’s warm breath hits her cheek as she leans closer. Canary blushes, distracted by how much she wants to kiss her again. “Do it fast,” she whispers, “I want to kiss you again.”

Amane flushes bright red and squeezes her fists together nervously. “You—you stop that,” she giggles, “trying to distract me.” She quickly kisses Canary’s cheek and then squints at her earlobe again. “Okay, here goes!” 

The needle punches through Canary’s ear and slips back, quickly replaced by the pearl earring. Amane leans back and cups Canary’s chin, trying to make sure the piercings are even. She lets out a relieved sigh. Canary laughs. “Checking to make sure you didn’t maim me?”

“Yes,” Amane says seriously. She pinches both of Canary’s cheeks and giggles. “I didn’t think you could get any prettier,” she whispers shyly. 

“You are so FREAKING cute,” Canary exclaims. She flings her arms around Amane and hugs her tightly, giving her a quick kiss before pulling back to grin at her. “Can I say something crazy?”

“You’re going to anyways,” Amane teases. 

Canary’s smile softens. “I love you,” she whispers, “and I know that’s kind of a problem, but I do.”

“Oh,” Amane gasps. Her face is bright red again around her wide eyes. She grabs Canary’s wrists and shoves them back, panic overtaking her body. “I—Canary—we,” she stammers, “oh—I—um, um—“

Canary shrugs. “I know, I know.”

“I—I—I LOVE YOU, TOO,” Amane shouts suddenly. She slaps her hands over her mouth and looks around wildly. Canary whoops loudly and dissolves into giddy laughter, rolling around on the blanket as Amane jumps up to scan their surroundings. The taller girl races back to the blanket and tackles Canary in a hug when she sees they’re still alone. “I love you,” she whispers excitedly, “I—I’m in love with you, Canary!”

“That’s so COOL,” Canary yells back. She tenses all of her muscles excitedly and flings her arms around Amane, squeezing her tightly as they both giggle. “I wish we could do this all the time,” she whispers.

“Me, too,” Amane sighs. She kisses the top of Canary’s head through her springy hair and blushes. “I... I’d really like to be able to hold your hand,” she whispers shyly, “I just think that would be nice.”

Canary smiles and rolls onto her back, sticking her arm out towards the other girl. Amane nervously slips a gloved hand into her palm and she laughs, pulling the gloves off before intertwining their fingers. She slowly traces her thumb along Amane’s slender knuckles and gives her hand a gentle squeeze. “This was such a good idea, Amane,” she giggles. Canary tilts her head back and looks up at the patches of sky visible through the crumbling roof. “Didn’t you want to look at the stars?”

“Mmhmm.” Amane rolls flat on her back and grins up at the curve of the moon, dizzy with the sensation of Canary’s skin brushing against her own. She squeezes their intertwined fingers and cranes her neck towards Canary. “But I really just wanted to spend time with you,” she admits quietly.

“I know,” Canary laughs. She looks over at Amane and grins. “Tsubone caught me with a cootie catcher earlier,” she whispers conspiratorially, “do you wanna hear her fortune?”

Amane’s free hand flies up to cover her laughter as she nods. “Of course!”

“It said her true love was closer than she thinks,” Canary giggles, “and she started talking about how her work is her true love, and the family, blah blah blah.”

“Oh my gosh,” Amane giggles. She flings her arms around Canary and hugs her quickly. “You’re going to get us in trouble one of these days,” she says, trying to sound firm through her laughter.

“I have no idea what you mean,” Canary snickers. She reaches for Amane’s head and sits up to kiss her, still giggling as their lips meet. Amane’s hand squeezes hers again and she beams, breaking away to rest their foreheads together. “How much time do you think we have?”

“Not much longer,” Amane sighs. She tenderly strokes Canary’s cheek and gives her a sad smile. “And we shouldn’t go back right at the same time, I think,” she adds softly.

Canary sighs dramatically and pecks her again. “Drat. Well, should we look at the stars, or just stay here until we have to go?”

“I don’t want to move,” Amane whispers. She can feel the warmth of her own breath rolling off of Canary’s skin and leans closer, chastely pressing their lips together. An owl hoots as she slowly pulls back. She glances over her shoulder, tense with a sudden fear. “Canary, should—“

“Probably, but I don’t want to,” Canary interrupts quietly. She turns Amane’s head back to face her and grins. “I love you,” she whispers, “wow, that’s really fun to say.” 

Amane goes red and squeezes Canary’s hand tightly. “You—you’re,” she stammers bashfully, “you, I, well, I, I love you too, duh.”

“Goof,” Canary laughs.

“Shut up,” Amane giggles. She kisses Canary once more, trying to focus on the feeling of her lips, to memorize the soft contours of her face, to burn every tiny detail of her beauty into her mind in case months pass before she’s able to kiss her again. She banishes all thoughts of their jobs, of her grandmother, of the icicles overhead and the beasts in the forest, wanting to exist solely as Amane and Canary, if only for this moment. Canary’s unstoppable laugh finally breaks the kiss and Amane blushes again. “Okay,” she says softly, “I think we should probably go.”

Canary sighs and tucks a long strand of black hair behind Amane’s ear. “Okay,” she says sadly.

“I don’t want to,” Amane whispers.

“I know,” Canary replies. She slowly takes her hand back and stands up. “So I’ll go first. I should take the mug, too, so it looks like I was just being greedy,” she sighs. 

Amane’s shoulders slump as she passes over the empty mug. “Okay,” she sighs.

Canary wraps her scarf around her neck again and tucks the mugs into her jacket. She turns to Amane with a small smile. “I bet we could get away with doing this again,” she whispers.

“Maybe,” Amane giggles. She stands up and hugs Canary once more, pulling her close to inhale the warm, fresh scent of her hair. “Okay. Okay,” she murmurs, reluctantly releasing the shorter girl as Canary squeezes her arm. She picks up a candle and blows it out. “Well,” she sighs, “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

“You sure will,” Canary says brightly. She pecks Amane on the cheek and hops out into the snow, shoving her hands into her pockets as she turns to say goodbye. “I love you,” she says, as loudly as she dares, “I love you, and I’m gonna kiss your beautiful face again soon, just you wait!”

Amane’s cheeks flush hot pink as Canary laughs and bounds away through the trees. She shoves the remaining evidence of their picnic into her bag and waits, counting a full five minutes before trailing after the other girl towards their quarters. Her heart feels feathery and joyous, tethered to the earth by heavy feet and a small icicle of sadness in her stomach. She hugs herself tightly as she walks. “No being sad,” Amane whispers to herself, “this was perfect. I can be sad tomorrow.” A smile breaks across her face as she remembers the feeling of Canary’s ear in her hands, the giddy laughter of her girlfriend when she saw the gift, and Amane looks up, letting the smile grow into itself while she walks. The feathery feeling in her heart spreads out through her veins again. Tomorrow. There will always be a tomorrow, and when she wakes up tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that, she’ll still be in love, and loved in return. She’s certain she can keep up the secret. Her love for Canary is simply too precious to share. The butler’s quarters loom before Amane and she laughs, already imagining the next time she’ll be able to make Canary smile.

  
  



End file.
